Sandy's Trauma and Beginning of Grief
Every One of us go Through Grief
OK, so I was on this journey – you can imagine. I loved the journey. And then, the next thing that happened was that tragedy in my life whereby my 3 daughters and their friend were murdered. I want to tell you about my journey of grief during this time. There may be some things there that can help. There are certainly some positive aspects that come out of it, so I’ll tell you about my journey of grief … and you know what? Every one of us here are going to have to go through grief.
Learning Through Adversity
Maybe many of us have already been through grief, and there’s going to be more. We’re all going to go through some adversity at some time. The key thing out of adversity and out of trauma is learning. What is there that you can learn from this event, because you know, those learning experiences are experiences for our soul and it’s the soul that needs the experience.
I’m so Glad I Spoke to my Girls That Night
So, Jenny and Kirsty, they were twins at 19 and Lexie, she was 16 – the next day. And the date was 23rd January 1987. They were living with their mum in the northern Sydney suburb of Pymble and a friend of theirs, Lisa was there as well, so there were 4 of them in the house. I was living about 5 kilometres away in Lindfield, married to Sandra and at that time we had a little 5 year old girl, Lara and a little 3 year old boy, Ian. At about 7 o’clock that Friday night I rang and spoke to Lexie and also spoke to Jenny and Kirsty and I tell you, the mirth and joy in that household was fantastic. They were all preparing to go camping for the Australia Day long weekend. And we taught them about camping, so I was really pleased about that. They were going to be joined by a group of friends to go camping. In retrospect I am so glad I was able to speak to the girls at that time, because at 10 past 9 that night Richard Madrell arrived at the door and professed his love for Jenny who of course had not had anything to do with him for 12 months and all of them wanted to keep him away with their mother even trying unsuccessful to take out an AVO on him. But he arrived at the door and shot her. He then shot Kirsty, then Lisa and then shot Lexie. All over in ten minutes.
My First Reaction
The police hammered on my door at about 2 o’clock in the morning and told me what had happened. My first reaction was that this was impossible … I mean I had only spoken to them several hours earlier. For me it was complete disbelief and I questioned about being shot with a shotgun as I knew something about guns from the army. I questioned the fact that it must have been impossible because with a shotgun you have to load it, fire and then re-load it, re-load it again …. Surely one or two of them are going to be able to get away. Surely not all 4 of them, not all 3 of my girls.
I Still Couldn’t Believe it.
On the way to their home in the police car I was still arguing with the police and I was asking if they had seen their bodies. “Oh, so you haven’t seen their bodies … you haven’t actually been there …. You’ve only been told about this over the radio … so you don’t really know this for sure.” Always thinking and hoping that it’s not true.
My Denial Phase
And then a little bit of doubt would come in and it would be like this: “God, how could you let this happen. No, no no, you haven’t let it happen. But …. If you have … what have the girls done? What have they done to deserve this for goodness sake? There is no God.” And so that’s where my denial phase started.
By Sandy MacGregor – http://www.selfimprovementdeals.com
See it on Video – 09 of 16 Sandy's Trauma and Beginning of Grief
Next Video – 10 Hatred Anger and Revenge Can Become Habits During Grief
Today, Whole Planet Foundation is kicking off its 2012 Prosperity Campaign at Whole Foods Market®, with the goal of raising $4.1 million to fund poverty alleviation projects across the globe and right here in the U.S.
Through Facebook®, shoppers can submit a 25 – 350 word essay on how their small actions are making a big impact for a chance to win a trip for two to India from Intrepid Travel®. On this seven-day adventure, travelers will experience the power of microcredit firsthand as they meet with loan recipients and take in India’s vibrant sights, sounds and flavors. For details and to enter, visit facebook.com/wholeplanetfoundation and select the “Whole Planet Foundation: Small Change for Big Change” tab. The deadline to enter is March 18. Winners will be announced on April 2.
To view Multimedia News Release, go to http://www.multivu.com/mnr/49711-whole-planet-foundation-campaign-to-alleviate-poverty
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We Learn a Lot From Our Children
The other thing I had was meditation as taught to me by my young son Andrew – wow, can’t we learn a lot from our children. Andrew taught me meditation, and I was meditating – endeavouring to get some sort of peace, some sort of clarity … that sort of thing and I knew it was good for relaxation, stress release, anxiousness and all that sort of thing.
The Greatest Wake Up Call
So I already knew all of that, so I did it. And you know what? I got the greatest wake up call that you could ever get. It was like a whack across the head … and this was it: “Hey, if you persist in being hateful, angry and vengeful … then you’re going to end up like that! Wow! In other word, if I talked to myself 65,000 times a day, then I am going to be another victim … and who has done it to me? Me … haven’t I. I’ve done it to myself.
By Sandy MacGregor – http://www.selfimprovementdeals.com
See it on Video – 12 of 16 A Wake-Up Call - Talking to Yourself Negatively
Next Video – 13 Asking the Wrong Question Can Lead to Guilt, Blame and Judgements
In response to the epidemic of lives lost to Lung Cancer in the U.S., and the world’s Number One Cancer Killer, Maroon 5 has joined BJALCF as an incredible Grammy-award-winning VOICE to launch a national and international Lung Cancer Awareness campaign. This campaign encourages everyone to spread awareness and raise funding for the cancer that kills more than 1.3 million worldwide annually and 450 per day in the United States.
To view Multimedia News Release, go to http://www.multivu.com/mnr/54989-maroon-5-adam-levine-bonnie-j-addario-lung-cancer-foundation-bjalcf
Reese Witherspoon, Avon Global Ambassador & Honorary Chairman of the Avon Foundation for Women, today launches the new Empowerment “Circle of Support” Necklace in recognition of International Women’s Day on March 8th. The necklace is the latest Avon fund-raising product that raises life-saving funds for the Avon Speak Out Against Domestic Violence program, which has donated nearly $40 million to end the epidemic of violence against women globally.
To view Multimedia News Release, go to http://www.multivu.com/mnr/52893-avon-empowerment-necklace-reese-witherspoon-international-women-s-day
The St. Patrick’s Festival is one of the highlights of Ireland’s cultural calendar — a week-long celebration of music, dance, outdoor spectaculars and of course, on March 17th, the stunning St. Patrick’s Day parade through the historic streets of Dublin. The festival is the traditional starting point of the holiday season and what a year 2012 is going to be.
2012 is the year when Northern Ireland will take center stage with a series of spectacular occasions. Titanic Belfast, the largest Titanic visitor experience in the world, will open its doors in April. The new visitors centre at the UNESCO world heritage site at the Giant’s Causeway will open in the fall and the European Tour’s Irish Open golf tournament will return to Royal Portrush in June. These events and many more come under the banner ‘Northern Ireland 2012 –Your time, our place.’
To view Multimedia News Release, go to http://www.multivu.com/mnr/55131-tourism-ireland-st-patrick-s-day-dublin-the-gathering-welcome-vacation
A Southern culinary staple is teaming up with the track Too Tough to Tame. Bojangles’ today announced its title sponsorship of South Carolina’s only NASCAR Sprint Cup Series race, the Bojangles’ Southern 500 at Darlington Raceway. The race will start at 7 p.m. on Saturday, May 12, in its traditional spot on Mother’s Day weekend.
Hungry race fans can also look forward to enjoying Bojangles’ at the track! The sponsorship agreement allows Bojangles’ to serve its delicious Chicken Supremes™, Cajun Filet Sandwich, Seasoned Fries™ and Legendary Iced Tea® at Darlington Raceway. This Bojangles’ menu will also be served at four other tracks owned and operated by International Speedway Corp.: Daytona International Speedway, Talladega Motor Speedway, Martinsville Raceway and Richmond International Raceway.
To view Multimedia News Release, go to http://www.multivu.com/mnr/55182-bojangles-title-sponsorship-bojangles-southern-500-at-darlington-raceway
Newly formed entertainment company The Mogue Collective announces the launch of Dance2LAX: a non-competitive dance workshop featuring eight classes by world famous choreographers Brian Friedman (X-Factor; Britney Spears), Laurie Ann Gibson (Lady Gaga), Gil Duldulao (Janet Jackson) and UK based Sisco Gomez (So You Think You Can Dance), also boasting celebrity host Carmit Bachar from the original Pussycat Dolls. The two-day intensive event will be held for the first time in London at the Hilton Metropole Hotel, Monarch Ballroom, April 7th and 8th 2012. A live showcase performed in a pop concert atmosphere and an exclusive VIP party at Minako at the Met will round out the weekend.
To view Multimedia News Release, go to http://www.multivu.com/mnr/53793-dance2lax
